Wednesday, June 26, 2013

This is What I Did: by Ann Dee Ellis

Warning SPOILERS!!!

This book is a bit of a puzzle. I don't feel I can really discuss it without giving away some of the plot, so I am not going to even try. The story is told from the point of view of Logan, whose best friend Zyler lived with a father who would physically abuse him. From the beginning, Zyler had told Logan not to tell anyone when Zyler suffered some injury at the hands of his father. And the injuries weren't minor - black eyes, broken arm, cuts requiring stitches, etc. Then, at one point, Logan witnesses an assault on not just Zyler, but also on Cami, a girl who was with Zyler, when Zyler's father was ostensibly gone. The father returned unexpectedly and assaulted not just Zyler, but also the girl - ripping her clothes. If there was a sexual assault, and it seems likely that that is what occurred, Logan (and the reader) didn't see that explicitly, but he did hear what was going on. Zyler then attacked his father and thought he might have killed him. Logan listened in horror - and fled. After escaping the scene, he not only did nothing, but he also refused to open his window to help Zyler and Cami when Zyler tried to get some help.

The book is really about the aftermath of the attack, but the story is not told in sequence, rather it jumps around in time from early days of their friendship, to Logan's life after Zyler has moved away, to events unfolding just before the attack. Basically, Logan has to learn to live with the guilt of doing nothing, of having actively refused to do anything. He does this by actively refusing to do anything to combat the abuse he is also suffering at the hands of the kids in his Boy Scout troup. Occasionally, he gets to a point where he can't stand it any more and he fights back, but this seems to only make matters worse, reinforcing his tendency to do nothing instead of act. A budding friendship with another girl, Laurel, and a part in a play seem to gradually bring him to the point where he can take some action, but it is an excruciating journey and, even at the end of the book, when he has finally stood up to the Boy Scout troup leader, the reader is left with the question of whether Logan really is going to be OK. The author attempts to show his positive progress with the Boy Scout leader incident and with Logan's willingness to email Zyler, but it still isn't clear that he is on the road to recovery - or what shape his recovery will take.

The story works for me, in spite of the tenuous conclusion, except for one hole in the story. At one point, one of Zyler's teachers says she has had enough (she has seen Zyler with too many "accidental" injuries) and she decides to take action. But, rather than reporting the abuse to the proper authorities, she confronts the father himself - and that is the end of it. As a teacher, I just can't see this happening. In ALL of the school districts I have worked in (and that is quite a few, since I have moved around a bit), teachers are reminded of the LAW that they have to report suspected child abuse. They don't confront the perpetrator, they REPORT it. It would have worked better for me if the author had written that the teacher reported the abuse, but the father stopped abusing for a while, until the case went cold. The case worker moved on to more active cases. Then the abuse started again.

An unsettling book. I am not sure who the audience for it is.

No comments:

Post a Comment